Tuesday, 14 June 2011

Those whom the gods wish to destroy...

....they first make mad

But why oh why choose the owners of AVFC! And what greater sign of madness than to interview the bluenose manager or ex manager a certain Alex McLeish.

There is rejoicing in the Holte End over every bluenose who repents but as they say is the Pope no longer a Catholic? Will a Capulet become a Montague? Can the Texans lay down their guns? Will Teapot give up the leaf? Have the French abandoned their croissants?

We must be living in a parallel universe. The realm of anti matter has arrived. Morgana le Fay has cast her spell and Deadly Doug must be recalled to break it
.
But until that day man the barricades in Witton Lane. Sound the trumpet. Beat the drum. The bluenose shall not pass!

Wednesday, 8 June 2011

A break in play...

......not for rain yesterday at the second Test between England and Sri Lanka at Lords but rather a shattering of glass in the pavilion caused by Matt Prior's bat.

There is still an element of mystery about why the bat suddenly stood up and attacked the glazing. A batting glove accidentally pushed it over perhaps. More likely the wizard of spin, Graham Swan was practising one of his spells and it went sadly awry. Just think what wreckage a doosra might cause.

Or may be truth is  its owner decided to prove Newton's second law of motion after being run out not many minutes into his innings. If so he will be in good company. We know how football managers can sweep entire tray loads of half time refreshments across the length of the changing room and tennis players bounce the racket higher than the ball before serving after a bad line call.

Nothing however compares with the wrath of a Sontaran on the end of some spicy sledging in an inter galactic match I once attended. Happily it was taking place on planet with the mass of Jupiter so the effort of lifting the bat to face some hostile Silurian bowling left no room for even more gravitational exploits.